the last 24 hours

has been pretty awful.

first a disclaimer. i try not to complain because i remind myself that things could always be worse and i try not to let myself overreact to things that aren’t worth the trouble.

that said, about 24 hours ago (10:30 last night) i was frantically working on a paper which due at noon the next day when my computer froze. it was a little worrisome because that was the second time that day that my computer froze and it usually never freezes. long story short, my computer was never able to successfully boot back up and i spent 3 hours trying to troubleshoot the problem and sought the help of over five people. i went from telling myself that there’s no use in freaking out over things you can’t control and totally breaking down into tears. if you repeat that over and over again, that was basically how I spent the hours between 10:30 and 1:30. I went to bed at 2 and woke up and 6 and resumed the sections of the paper that i hadn’t written yet on my boyfriend’s laptop.

I went to school around 9 and had the IT department look at my laptop which did not even turn on at that point. I cried in my professor’s office and she gave me an extension. i was pretty sure she would’ve given me an extension anyway since she indicated it in an email she wrote me earlier that day but i cried just because i was so miserable i couldn’t help it. i tried to drive after that but was barely able to due to the lack of sleep and emotional torture of the last 12 hours or so. i heard the song “bad day” on the radio and while i usually find that song annoying, it was comforting today.

i went to the apple store and had them look at it. it took three hours. at this point in time, i had gone 9 hours without food. it was so busy, just one thing after the other. basically, they were not sure about my computer but it looks grim. i’m afraid to use it but it worked long enough for me to get my files and install snow leopard. i think the bottom line is that my computer’s broken and i need a new one.

then, i had to scramble to get my cat to the vet. she peed on me in the car on the way to the vet and i smelled like cat urine for the rest of the lovely afternoon. i still hadn’t eaten. i spent 3 hours at the vet and cried there too. anyway, bad news from the vet. first he scared the shit out of me saying that he thinks my cat might die of kidney failure. after an enormous vet bill that i can’t afford, i find out that she has a thyroid problem and i will have to medicate her the rest of my life. this was actually great news because i thought she was gonna die. one funny thing that came out of that was when i said “the flies are attracted to me because i smell like pee” and didn’t realize how i sounded until my boyfriend made fun of me.

since then, i rushed home and spent the last 3 hours frantically finishing up my paper which i promised to my professor by tonight. i took bites of an old sandwich in my fridge in between typing sprees. now i feel exhausted. i should feel relieved but i don’t. i feel like the quality of my paper has gone down drastically due to the fact that i had to write it while experiencing my own unique hell with my computer crashing, sick cat, getting peed on then having to smell it, having this deadline looming over my head, and not enough food or sleep.

tomorrow’s sure to be busy too but at least i can sleep tonight and i won’t have this stupid paper hanging over my head.

finally, to end on a positive note, all these bad events did help me see the good in a lot of things: all the people who came to my aid when my computer crashed on the worse night of the year, my cat isn’t gonna die, i didn’t have to rewrite my entire paper, and my professor allowed me an extension.

p.s. there are probably a lot of typos in this blog entry since my brain is working at a much lower capacity than it normally does.

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